.negativity.

do u know someone whom all the time would only has your bitter life at interest? how should i put it? this particular someone would ask only the worst and problematic issues that u're suffering or even facing at any particular moment. this kind of person would very much know which button to push and what questions to ask whenever u meet them.

pretty sickening actually.

i live my life so well that i deduct all the negativities altogether. i have thrown away everything that can possibly makes me sad, hate or even angry. i made peace of myself and i tried so hard in juggling every single thing in my life, my way and whatever happens daily usually are in my control and definitely in my own will. anything unpredictable that happens usually would require more attention and effort from myself and i surely would have all the possible remedies to cure them all meaning to solve everything and get everything back to normal.

but some people?? then tend to dig and suck your happiness by asking the "right" questions and trigger the sadness in you. i think its inappropriate! jenis jaga tepi kain orang dengan perkara bukan bukan. haish. madness. anybody whom is sane would of course get what you're doing and flip instantly. sheesh.  as if you never learn.

i assume that these people are never really happy with their own life and will only feel good when others suffer and really interested in making others unhappy. what a pity. they lack confidence and happiness in their own life and their well-being potrayed is faked? maybe. :)

patience. that is the only key. im down to having my patience at a seriously high level to care or even flinch to the unnecessary inquisitiveness that certain people have in me. i could not care less. the most i can do is just ignore and throw you away. you would pretty much be invisible in the future to me. that simple.

for me, im never at lost. i just have to find a way out. eventually there is nothing anybody can do to tick me off. that level of peace, is something that i yearn for. so far so good.

so, syukur.

.arctic monkeys.

alex turner. his looks. his voice. divine! ;))

this is an acoustic video; suck it and see from the arctic monkeys.

"i pour my aching heart into a popsong, i couldn't get the hang of poetry..
 that's not a skirt girl that's a sawn-off shotgun..."

hahaha!

this is so included inside my playlist. and alex turner, be cruel to me, and i'm a fool for u.. ;))

plus u can serenade me anytime! :p

.wanderlust.

a direct definition: wanderlust is a very strong or irresistable impulse to travel.

    wanderlust poster: courtesy google.

and i might add, that impulse is driven by the choice of finding one true self. well, there will be at some point in your life, you kinda lost it and yup, you will surely have to start again and in other terms, you want to manage all the screw-ups that you have done. you wanna mend your feelings or your heart? well in my case, yeah! ouch! touchy touchy! ;p

therefore, i opt for travelling! seriously, the perks of travelling is endless. i love travelling like a lot. since a couple of significant events in my life, i opt for travelling. i travel almost monthly, anywhere and i just can't sit tight without having the chance to travel. the freedom u possess while travelling is yours. you free yourself from any baggage that you are carrying. you are FREE. literally FREE.

and recently, i went travelling solo. it was risky, seriously risky from my mother's point of view but yeah, i went for it. it was to a nearby country for almost a week. i was pretty nervous, scared and anxious all at the same time. but i really went for it. to my surprise, given the new environment, culture, dialect and community altogether, i survived. i really really want to test myself that much so i worked my ass up to ensure everything went smoothly and i am safe. alhamdulillah, it was a success.

that trip tested my survival skills. i need to be very choosy on food as i need halal food, i was on a tight budget even as a solo traveller so i did bargain and negotiate whenever any mode of transportation is needed other than my prime mode of transportation; my two feet! the language barrier! gosh i hate that but i survived through finger pointing and drawing.. hi hi! directions are important as u usually walk alone. but the main thing for me is accomodation during travelling. that's crucial, so i really secured a really clean and safe place for me. and near to my staying place, is the mosque. so, alhamdulillah, what more do i need. other basic necessities can be found easily as the 7elevensss (more than one) are also nearby. phewww.

the best part was, you travell to your own rules. you go whenever you wanna go whenever. you eat whatever you want, it your choice. whatever actions that u take, the consequences will go back at you. that's the best. lonely? nahh. it will get back to the purpose of your travelling. when i decided to go travel solo, i just want to free my mind, test myself, survive, enjoy myself, make new friends, try anything that i haven't done, explore, do it all safely and come back in one piece. ;)

when i got back, i felt so relieved as i survived. but really, He was there all the time. so i owe it all to Him. and maybe because of my wanderlust, i became someone that i never knew was there inside of me. :)

to wanderlust!

who could not surrender to a view as magnificent as this? well, i'm glad i surrendered. ;)

.Charles Bukowski.

The Captain is Out to Lunch and the Sailors Have Taken Over the Ship

“There's nothing to mourn about death any more than there is to mourn about the growing of a flower. What is terrible is not death but the lives people live or don't live up until their death. They don't honor their own lives, they piss on their lives. They shit them away. Dumb fuckers. They concentrate too much on fucking, movies, money, family, fucking. Their minds are full of cotton. They swallow God without thinking, they swallow country without thinking. Soon they forget how to think, they let others think for them. Their brains are stuffed with cotton. They look ugly, they talk ugly, they walk ugly. Play them the great music of the centuries and they can't hear it. Most people's deaths are a sham. There's nothing left to die.”

...........................

Above is one of the excerpts written in the said book. I love the quote and how we could relate to it. When i first read it, it brought a sense of emotion into me reminding me the value of death and how we perceive death nowadays. I read this one many times and stayed in my thoughts for a long time. It hit me that yup, we humans, earth dwellers are too caught up with their lives even when they don't understand their own lives anymore. Sometimes, we just carry on and did not even stop for a moment to think about the meaning and the objectives of us living anymore and its pretty sad.

The book is a journal, excerpts written by Charles Bukowski himself. Its personal, honest and somewhat captivating. He was old at that time; in his 70s and he wrote about his everyday life and what he thought about, literally anything. It is one of the things that gave life more meaning to it once we get a hold of his thinking and writing.

and here i gave u two more writings to be pondered upon. :)

from imgace.com

from fine art america : a Richard Tito painting

thank you charles bukowski.

.a tribute to kerisi berlada.

apa itu kerisi?

Kerisi adalah sejenis ikan daripada famili Nemipteridae. Salah satu spesis nya dalam banyak adik beradik dia adalah Japanese Threadfin Bream atau nama saintifiknya Nemipterus japonicus. fuhhh. * dah lama tak main nama saintifik ikan ni!

namun begitu..(bahahaha!) ikan kerisi selalu dikenal pasti dengan sisiknya yang kemerah merahan dia atas dan sesetengah spesis ada jalur kuning memanjang daripada kepala memanjang hingga ke ekor. jadi warna dia memang cantik; ada merah, kuning dan putih. cantik sangat ini ikan. biasanya juga ikan kerisi selalu berisi. gemuk je. nampak sangat belly dia gemuk. atau sepanjang yang saya jumpa semuanya jenis kerisi berisi. beautiful fish!

ini adalah gambarajah ikan kerisi :

sumber : google search  ;)

cantik kan? sukanya lah kat ikan kerisi. rasanya pula memang manis kalau jenis yang baru sampai ke jeti. baru kena tangkap dengan nelayan pulak memang sedapnya! tulang dia juga tidak menyusahkan. jenis biasa dan tak memerlu penglihatan dan tenaga luarbiasa untuk diasingkan. ikan yang baik kan?

oh kerisi.

bila memasaknya, digoreng sahaja sudah memadai. gaul dengan garam kunyit, biar masin sikit. goreng api perlahan tapi sampai garing. lepas digoreng memang dekat tepi tepi ikan tu, garing, masin, kuning, kruk krak! haish! memang sedapppp. isinya dekat tengah manis je. kulit dia kalau dah nak terkopak tu dengan warna kuning kunyit keemas emasannya, masin..waduh! ambil masa makan ikan kerisi, tenang kunyah dan makan betul betul. sangatlah memuaskan hati.

selain itu, boleh juga dimasak lada ikan kerisi ini. tumis lada yang dah kisar, bawang, asam jawa sedikit, tumis dengan doa dan penuh kasih sayang.. dan masukkan ikan kerisi yang dah digoreng tadi. gaul, biarkan ia dimandikan dengan tumisan berlada yang pasti akan menusuk satu rumah. tunggu dan biarkan tumis lada tu garing, kehitam hitaman. memang tumisan atau kuah akan jadi kurang, tak berkuah sangat tapi garing dia tu bila makan dengan nasi panas nanti, tenyeh tenyeh aiyomaaaa pehhh!!

hasil masakan ikan kerisi berlada yang menjadi biasanya seperti inilah rupanya :

indah kan?? i love u forever and ever kerisi berlada!

.levitation photography.

what are the odds that u suddenly discover something that intrigues u instantly? and the best part is, u realized it coincidentally. yup, while i was browsing.. *am suppose to sleep early today for i have series of errands to run tomorrow + travelling .. i found out about levitation photography!

so, what is levitation photography??

its basically pictures that appear as if the object is levitating or floating. yes its not au natural. u have to work with items such as boxes, crates, sofas, beds, ladders, ropes, tripod and of course photoshop or any other reliable software that would make layers editing possible. but still, believe me the result is too natural to be true! i think its a handful of process; choosing the concept, idea, setting up, picking the venue and the best timing that nature could provide; well its a lengthy procedure altogether without doubt. but when u see the picture, its all worth it. definitely.

here i give u a few samples of levitation photos that caught my attention. what a fruitful browsing tonight! :)

by Vikas Anand

so this first one is a picture of a man, levitating in an almost perfect manner. btw, i love sunsets. the transition from daytime to nighttime; that is one amazing scene. and with this picture, seriously, it was done so well. the sunset exposure in between his legs, the light reflection, the water and silhouettes of the buildings. very nice. perfect! but maybe its even nicer if the model was a lady and the photographer could play around with her hair. well, just a thought of mine. :p

by  Luke Takes

this second one is very well done. i admire the concept. my mind simply went on thinking about the technical stuffs like where did he position whatever that is holding this lady? i mean how did he edited it soo well? and her feet! look at her feet, its almost natural to be stepping on guard by the wall as if she has Spiderman abilities or something. but however her left foot might be a little off but. that's tolerable. the colour coordination is somewhat mysterious too. and when u have reflections; in this case her hand, well that just gain this picture extra points! gosh! very nice!

by Gigikassis

this third one, funny, magical, mindblowing?? ahah! its blowing the model herself. i love it that he showed lots of items levitating at the same time, again i wonder how did he do that? its very neat that he focused on all the details. the cap, nozzle and she herself with her hair in place.. this is one cool picture. Esso should be giving her credits, huh?

.....

these are all examples of astonishing shots that were captured and produced so well. but in relevant to these pictures, i would like to present to u a picture taken in 1948 by a noted photographer, Phillipe Hansman. its a collaboration shot with fellow painter, Salvador Dali. i tell u, this picture did not go through photoshop editing but merely 28 times of tossing the cats and waters inclusive the jumping session of the model to produce a satisfactory picture.

Dali  Atomicus

Phillipe Hansman had photographed celebrities and even during his time, he had always ask his models to jump and mind you again i repeat the shots were taken in an au natural composition and setting. the endresult did not go through any software editing. so, he was one remarkable photographer!

lastly, i give u a couple of photos taken by Natsumi Hayashi (yowa yowa camera woman), a japanese lady whom has staged herself all around Japan even in crowded places; levitating! she did it so graceful and elegant. u can check her pictures out. some of them may be tad spooky which i dare not attach here for significant reasons. :)

so did u enjoy all the photos?? all of them are doped, right?? i am impressed. levitation photography for me has taken photography altogether, one notch higher. maybe i would indulge myself in making levitating shots like them. well, who knows right! haha!

lastly, before i sign out, i have to mention this one dude whom is soo crazy u will not believe his photos. believe me, believe your eyes. i've warned u. close your mouth gentleman. i give u, Li Wei!! a combination of very artistic, acrobatic, levitating, drama and even a touch of Kungfu Hustle in them. Enjoy! ;)

 till then! hip hip for awesome photography!

.speed the collapse.

it is one of "metric" 's song. i love that canadian band. but in relating to the title above, it makes sense right?

metric's  latest album. one of canada's best!

okay..but "what" collapse?

hear me! your uterus wall; never fails to collapse. when u're dehydrated or deprived nutrition, u tend to collapse. kebulur in malay. when u sustain excessive heat for a long period of time, u may collapse. when u lost in a battle, your strategy backfires or u're outnumbered in a war, your empire might collapse. when your investment did not go to the way u're expecting it to be, your shares or the stocks exchange would collapse, waves, as they shoal; triggered by winds will eventually collapse and touch the shore and if its so powerful and high enough; well i give u tsunami baby! 

given the examples, collapsing or collapse as a root word is a matter of falling apart, failure, mishap, decline or breaking down. its basically antonyms to rise, winning, success, significant..collapse in the easiest sense means loose.

so why so we want to speed the collapse as what metric's says?

because of pain? suffering? crappy moments? too hard too handle at times?? problematic? cry? sadness??

all of these are related to collapsing. when we anticipate hardships, or faced with testing scenarios, i for one reason want it to pass quickly. it takes time to process the fact that we are facing challenging moments that would actually put us in a brief moment of sadness but yup, i want it to pass quickly. embrace the moment, accept and adapt but seriously i would do anything to expedite the process.

why??

so that the hurt of the suffering is BRIEF. so that its temporary. i believe, by speeding the testing moments, we can realize quickly its only up to us and us only to resolve it, get a hold of it, respond, change, make amends, rise, ascend and get pass it. with all your might and will, its never impossible. and with hopes and actions combined, the phase will eventually fade.

at least that's what i thought. who would have known through a song title; there could so much to be pondered upon. so yeah, nobody wants to feel eternal pain. so, that's why we would want to speed the collapse. hihi!

the vocalist: emily haines alongside her bandmates.

i rest my case.

p/s: hear the metric out! seriously awesome music. if we are on the same page. ;)